Fear

I guess each and every Bombayite would have felt fear in their lives at some point of time, since Bombay has seen it all, be it floods, bomb blasts, riots, earthquakes and many such incidents have in some way have brought it out in all of us.

Bombay was brought to a stand still yet again, but this time it wasn't a bomb blast which ripped through a train or a crowded place but it was far worse than that. Some terrorists had attacked our city and were on a mission to create havoc throughout the city. And this time it wasn't the common man that got attacked but some of the prestigious, elite people who are the foundation of the commercial capital of our country. The terrorists had gone insane shooting at their own free will at VT station, walked in the Oberoi & the Taj Mahal hotel and opened fire like a gardener watering his plants.

I know its a lil too late that im writing bout this, but there is a particular reason im writing this. its not about how the government fucked up the whole situation, or the cheap comments from our politicians or the near 60 hour ordeal that went into capturing all the terrorists. This article is bout me, my experience of the whole incident from a view which can only be seen from the television news channels.

I think this must have been the maximum news that i must have watched for my whole lifetime. I was completely drained on 27th watching the news channel, at the end i was so freaking bored that i just didn't want to do anything else. Was just trying to absorb what exactly is happening out there. Innocent people getting killed for no rhyme or reason and the beautiful Taj Mahal hotel being destroyed every hour. It just was killing me every time there was an explosion or something like that. I was hoping that the terrorists wouldn't blow up the Taj. It would have been a great loss to this city. Everybody must have been glued to the TV like moths to the luminescent white bulb.

The next day when I went to work, people discussing bout all the various things about the attacks, some swearing at the ministers, the whole political system, few said it just sucks just couldn't take it anymore. Work was kinda keeping me distracted from the tension that could be seen on everybody's faces not just the office but public in general.

Around 3:00Pm in the afternoon there was this news of firing at CST station, Crawford Market, and all of a sudden there was panic in the air. People calling frantically their dear ones to check whether they are ok. People started leaving the office after we got an official mail from the management that the employees can leave at four. It was almost a helter-skelter kind of situation and there was even more panic on peoples faces.

The cops got onto their feet and started putting up nakabandis so that they could check cars and look for suspicious people or objects. I was out having a smoke amongst this hustle-bustle and as i was taking a drag i could see my fingers shiver. For the first time in my life I was actually scared i mean i was scared of my life. This pandemonium and too much of exposure to the television news it had created this anxiety in me. I feared for my life and was wondering what if the terrorists were in my area and were stopped by the cops and opened fire, a stray bullet could hit me. I never had this feeling in me that of FEAR. I wanted to be home at that precise moment.

This whole terrorists saga continued for almost 60 hrs. but this feeling of fear will never be forgotten by me. It still scares the daylights of me.
Thank God my friends, family, near & dear ones are all safe. My heartfelt condolences to all the families who have lost one of their members in the 26/11 incident.

Anyway that's all I had to say, cause FEAR was something which I hadn't felt ever.